College tours can be a hit-or-miss experience. You can never tell what will appeal to your child or turn him off.

“There’s a lot to be said for that immediate gut reaction,” observes Arlene Matthews, a college counselor and author of Getting In Without Freaking Out (Three Rivers Press). “It’s all about whether they feel good there.”

Sure it’s better to visit campuses during the school year, but many of us squeeze in a visit or three when we’re traveling during the summer. After all, we’re going to be in Boston for a wedding or Chicago for a meeting or heading to the beach in Southern California. Why not stop at a campus or two, even if your daughter is only a sophomore. We’re likely to have plenty of company on the tours because kids are applying to and visiting more colleges, the National Association for College Admission Counseling reports. More families, in fact, are opting to send their teens off with companies like College Visits which is run by a former Johns Hopkins University admissions official.

As a parent, I’ve endured long trips to a campus then dealt with a child who refused to get out of the car once we arrived. I’ve tried to buck up a child so rattled by a pompous tour guide that she was convinced she wouldn’t get in anywhere. We’ve gotten lost on unfamiliar roads and eaten cold pizza for dinner after we discovered that all the restaurants in the small college town closed by 8 p.m.

But we’ve also had some good laughs along the way. Here’s how to de-stress the tour process this summer:

• Insist that your child take charge.
  “This is their initiation into adulthood,” says Pennsylvania pediatrician Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg, co-author of the American Academy of Pediatrics’ book Less Stress, More Success about the college admissions process. “This has to be their process.” That means the kids should decide where to visit, call and make the appointments and introduce themselves at the admissions office when they arrive.

• Take a virtual tour before you set out to see campuses.
  The university or college Web site can give your son or daughter a sense of the place and perhaps help them to narrow down their selection – big or small, rural or urban – before you set out on a cross-country trek. Also suggest they check out student blogs posted on the Web sites.

• Make appointments.
  Ms. Matthews adds that it’s a mistake to just arrive on campus without calling ahead to arrange a tour or information session. “Schools want to know that you’re interested,” she explains. “Any contact is a good contact.”

• Plan for down time.
  Check the region’s tourism Web site to see what’s happening in the area. Often, college sites will suggest off-campus activities as well.

• Consider B&Bs when visiting small college towns.
  I discovered the innkeepers were a wealth of information about everything from campus sports to local restaurants and shopping. You’ll probably meet other families touring the same schools and can compare notes.

• Leave the siblings behind if they’re a lot younger.
  They’ll just be bored anyway. If you’re taking a morning from vacation to tour a school, and have another adult with you, take the younger kids elsewhere.

• Keep quiet.
  Let your son or daughter ask the questions on the tour. Use the time when you’re in the car or eating dinner to discern their feelings about the school. What did they like? What didn’t they like? Suggest they jot down a few notes.

• Pare down the itinerary.
  More than two schools a day, and it all becomes a blur: More than three days, and it’s too much to digest in one stretch.

• Don’t get discouraged.
  Remind them, and yourself, that they will find a school that they will like and that will welcome them.

“It’s going to go so quickly,” says Marty O’Connell, a veteran college admissions counselor and executive director of Colleges That Change Lives (www.ctcl.com). “You won’t have another opportunity to be with your child like this.”